Hello, ladies. Do you drive? Well, you better trade that Buick in for a camel!! According to Saudi historian Saleh al-Saadoon, while women used to ride camels, women can’t drive cars because the cars break down and then the women are raped. If you live outside of Saudi Arabia, you don’t care about being raped — the only thing that getting raped does to you is bring down your morale a bit. You know, like when you expect it to be sunny and it rains? Or when you want that special edition Red Bull in the yellow can, but 7-11 only has the regular kind? And your day just kind of sucks for a little bit.
Are you confused? Don’t worry, he goes on to tell us to listen to him “and get used to what society thinks, if [you] are really so out of touch with it.”
“But Manda,” you say, “what if the women are raped by the men who drive them around?!” Maybe you haven’t been paying attention, but obviously there is a solution for this: importing women drivers. “But wouldn’t this be a rapist’s dream?! Two women stuck in a broken down car, AKA a rape machine on useless wheels?!” Look, shut up — their rapists probably don’t do that. Also, sign me up. Sounds like a dream job.
Oh my god! I didn’t know that was the reason they couldn’t drive cars there! So upsetting!
One solution is to let them continue to rape the camels. Jihad!
Oh yeah totally – rape just kinda puts you in a bad mood for a bit but then it’s all sunshine and rainbows and it’s totally fine.
I guess that’s why women who get raped don’t ever suffer from PTSD or any sort of trauma, and they NEVER have to deal with the men in their lives blaming them for their rape on top of that. You never see any books, blogs, or any other writing from women who are working through and processing their trauma and healing …
Oh wait …