No, I Really Don’t Want Kids — I Think I Would Know

There has never been a day in my life when I thought I would want children.  My entire life, the thought of pregnancy has repelled me. It’s like I’m missing something in my genetic composition that makes other women go, “Yes, it would be beautiful to push a human out of my vagina.” I don’t associate love […]

I Hate Flying So Much I Cannot Even

Airports are like malls: it’s scientifically proven the second you step foot in either of these buildings, you immediately lose 15 IQ points. There isn’t much I hate more than flying. It’s probably the only thing I both despise and routinely subject myself to. I don’t mind the actual experience of being in the plane, it’s […]

Revenge Porn: Legal. Not Returning Engagement Ring After Fiance Cheats on You: Illegal

I’m pretty libertarian, and in general I’m against making more laws and restricting freedoms — unless, of course, what you’re doing is violating someone else’s rights by posting your ex’s naked photos all over the internet. If you aren’t supporting the movement to legally punish those who distribute revenge porn, you’re a fucking asshole. Don’t we […]